I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
How drunk do you think I'll be by the time I get home?
I just watched you drink a whole glass of wine through a Twizzler. Pretty drunk.
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
Randomize
