You really coming over, don't trick.
kristin has been a bad kristin
She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
Apparently I told the bartender to stop putting ice in my drink because it was taking up too much room
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
Best part about losing weight and not fitting into your pants any longer? They come off quick for chipotle emergencies.
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
