too bad you live with your parents still
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
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