She told me she only masterbates to Kenny Rogers songs.
OMG. What did u say?
I told her I did too.
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
new rule: cockblock me if I have had over a fifth of jack. no matter what.
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
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