I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
You don't understand. On her lunch break she sits on the roof, stares into the sky, and chain smokes. I can't get on her level. She is made up of java monsters with whiskey and a voice that sounds like sex.
You need to stop crushing on your boss or fuck her.
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
Randomize
