Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
Oh shit. I just had to lure him into the bedroom so I could take the list of his negative qualities off the fridge so he wouldn't see.
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
Never joke about your clitoris.
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
Randomize
