That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
at john mayer concert. alone. to many highschool kids. i feel like a drunk chaperone with a pomegranite martini mustache
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
Hey? Just a hypothetical. You ever accidentally kill somebody's cat on purpose? Like you didn't mean to but it had it coming? If you're wondering it tripped me while I was walking down the stairs and I landed on it as I fell.
Randomize
