what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
Whyyyyy do my fingers smell like Chinese food.
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
After much deliberatipn and vodka, my favourite phrase of Christmas 2012 is "penis of last resort"
I don't know if I want context or not...
Context involves faux incest and champagne. Id go into detail but im on shot number 5.
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
Randomize
