Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
i knew i liked her after she chugged tequila, fell down the stairs and said "oh dont worry i knew it'd be faster this way"
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
God that barista is texting me bout his life like i care i mean dude just hook me up with free coffee thats why i gave you my number
As shirtless as possible
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Randomize
