I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
you will always have a special place in my vag
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
Annabeth just got on the bar and slurred something about how she was worried that when she started dating you your penis wouldnt fit. You are one lucky bastard my friend.
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
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