Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
It's hard to be a gentleman when a girl pauses her karaoke version of "a whole new world," and proceeds to tell the entire bar that she wants your cock in her mouth.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
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