69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
Randomize