did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
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