Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
Thanks for telling my landlord that the poop stain was yours and not my secret dog.
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
I put an asterick after the names of people in my phone that I've fucked. Both as a form of bragging, and also so I can actually remember all their names.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
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