i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
