So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
I spent the entire party sexting people's significant others for them because they were too drunk to do it themselves. I did quite well too. I should start a business
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
Randomize
