I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
Note to self: the judgement that occurs when unrolling your last 5 which was used to snort drugs the night before, to pay for alcohol before noon on a Monday is worth just sucking it up and taking an overdraft fee.
Wait a min, you had drugs last night?!
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
An "unreasonable amount of ejaculate" isn't a reason to be angry at me.
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
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