...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
we should paint friendship bongs
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
Randomize
