Fuck appropriateness.
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
Randomize
