Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
i just renamed my vag "the sorting hat"
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
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