i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
Randomize
