i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
Did you get drunk between now and two texts ago?
Randomize
