am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
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