Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
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