I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
You know you're too drunk when you start calling people out for unfollowing you on social networks.
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
I passed out with the lights and tv on woke up at 4am SO confused and covered in goldfish so I ate them and went back to bed.. fuck xanax
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
Randomize
