idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
how do you play pong handcuffed?
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
I DONT HAVE A FUCKING JOB RIGHT NOW. DO YOU THINK I HAVE TIME TO WASTE GOING BACK AND FORTH WITH SOMEONE WHOS LYING, ABOUT LYING, AND JUST BEING A LIAR? HONESTLY, YES I DO HAVE TIME. BUT I HAVE A FUCKING LOT BETTER THINGS I COULD BE WASTING MY TIME DOING. LIKE ORGANIZING MY POKEMON CARD COLLECTION.
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
He sang the chorus to “Inside of you” by Russel Brand in Forgetting Sarah Marshall as he proceeded to not pull out...
Honestly? I wouldn’t even be mad, that probably took talent
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
