I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
this whole "benign brain tumor" is truly a blessing in disguise. I almost want to start bringing MRIs to the bar because sympathy pussy is flowing like the nile
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
