I just saw a hobo shake a payphone until it spat out a bunch of quarters. what a champ.
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
Randomize
