do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
finding my wedding ring encrusted in vomit this morning really just topped off last night...
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
Dude, I totally just made my launch phrase on my new phone "Wingardium Leviosa" so that when people try it and it doesn't work I can say, "It's leveeOHsa, not leveeoh-SA."
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
Randomize
