I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
Small penises have feelings too.
Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
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