You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize