I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
Hey can you text me Heidi's phone number. I just stapled her mattress to the wall and I want to send her a picture of it.
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
Randomize
