next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
I don't know... But I do think this is probably the longest series of texts we've written discussing your cock. David was right, it is a brave new world. Also, slow day at work again?
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
Randomize
