hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
They pay me enough to pretend to be either helpful, or heterosexual. If they want both I need one hell of a raise.
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
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