Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
Randomize
