I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
so after six weeks of dating she admitted shes bi and asked if it would freak me out if we brought another girl into the bedroom. i said no in this hesitant voice and she said 'if you let me dont worry ill make it up to you'
i literally fucking hate you so fucking much.
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
Just realized how many men I've had sex with for the first time in St. Patty's Day past. Currently sending "HAPPY SEXIVERSARY" texts...
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
Brb crying the tears of my youth
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
Randomize