dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
Randomize
