he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
Dude, we're at Einstein's Bagels and the dude next to us is spreading cannabutter on his bagel.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
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