She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
so im decorating easter eggs with my family and my mom is writing "Jesus is risen" and "God loves you!" on the eggs. i wrote things like "I'm naked!" and "there are drugs in these eggs!" on mine.
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
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