I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
Need ride home. Girls. Stolen keg. Rolling down streets. Horny girls. No condoms. Rescue needed. girls and beer in exchange for rescue and bacon?
I. Hate. You. Where are you, are said girls cute, and how did you know I bought bacon? And how does this always happen to you?
Smarter than the average bear
It's fucking 2020, I should be able to watch Netflix in the buff while making brownies without you getting preachy about it.
Randomize
