I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
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