Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
Funniest shit happened at the grocery store. This kid kept asking his mom for candy over and over and she told him 'daddy said no' and he screamed 'he isn't my dad' so loud everyone in the store was silent it was awesome.
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
Randomize
