Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
I wish there was a lawn mower version of Roomba so I could just drink and cheer it on from the stoop.
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
Randomize
