She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
I duct taped a bottle of vodka to the back of your closet while you were sleeping in case of emergencies. Go rip it off, it's going to be a long night.
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
Randomize
