I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
Randomize
