I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
He said "I can't wait for you to feel me inside of you so I can tell you gently that you're mine" and left me a 4 minute voice mail of him crying after I told him I didn't want to be with him. 30 year olds are off limits.
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
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