the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
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