Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
Someone broke into my car and stole it then left me $300 to pay for the damages with a lovely note that said "we just couldn't pass up the boxed wine... Sorry about the window."
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
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