Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
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