so the guy behind me in court for my DUI hearing got a DUI on a lawnmower at 1AM...he is my new hero
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
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